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Jackson and Sheridan Evicted From The Celeb Big Brother House in Double Eviction.

And then there was five! The double eviction left me bewildered, not so much with surprise that Tommy and Latoya are no longer house mates, Tommy was a cert and Latoya is understandable yet unwarranted, but the shock came when hearing the crowd reactions to the remaining house mates! It scares me to hear Ben Adams name cheered!! What is there to cheer, both evictees said that Ben was sweet, a nice guy, we all know that nice guys don’t win and I really hope this one doesn’t.

It looks like Terry, my personal favourite, has done enough to enrage the mob, I know Boo’s are standard but I think his affiliation with Coolio may be detrimental to his chances of taking the title. I’ve personally been writing to channel 4 with regards to these two, and I’m demanding they bring back ”The Word” with Terry and Coolio presenting, they are hilarious together! Seems like Verne, bookies favourite from the start is set to take the title, granted he’s a nice guy who takes on the challenge of his disability great but has he been the most interesting and entertaining house mate?

Last nights show started with Ulrika finally admitting that she would be happy to make the final and that it would in fact make her feel proud. She is clearly enjoying the potential fact that she is loved outside the house, and for the first time last night after a live eviction she didn’t cry when not booted out, practically carrying Latoya to the door and offering Tommy a sympathetic pat on the back respectively. It appears she’s now relishing the challenge of taking on the boys, and with her perceptive awareness of the viewing public maybe she will play the feminist role and take the boys head on in the closing days!? Already playing the victim card, ”If I had a heart attack in the corner I don’t think anyone of them would know.” It was Ulrika don’t forget that caused the original division in the house. I pray she doesn’t win, but with women her age being the majority of the voting public, each night I sleep I cry a little at the thought of Queen Ulrika!

The shopping task had an American theme, due to the Inauguration of Obamma, this meant some fun tasks for the house mates to take on, A pie eating competition for Terry and Ulrika, looked positively disgusting, Ulrika eating a pie with no hands may help with those feminist votes though. Terry and Ulrika failed this task but were the only ones which meant the house mates have a luxury shopping budget for the last three days, surely with so fewer house mates and so much money booze will be in abundance, let the good times role Verne.

Ben and Latoya were given a rodeo task, how fun, they got to mess around on a bucking bronco for the majority of the day, but boring Ben on receiving the task was moaning, even attempting to make that guy banterful is impossible. ”Ben today we are going to give you a million pounds, seven lap dancers a puppy dog and a gun”, still Ben would manage to bore me.

Coolio and Verne took to the road with a route 66 themed bike challenge which saw big brother jump at the chance to dress up/down Verne again! The boys had to do 500 laps of a circuit constructed in the garden, with 74 laps taking an hour and Verne suffering from chronic pain when just walking surely Big Brother may have underestimated the severity of this task causing Verne to literally drop out, much against his will to receive special treatment, awwww bless, how cute. It must have taken Coolio about 4 hours to complete the 500 laps, and I’m sure the fellow contestants were indebted to BB for the break.

Tommy who lets be honest was a boring house mate now, apart from the embarrassing Dad, ‘yo man’ touch shit with Coolio, that stuff was cringe worthy even for Westwood. He had a task of hitting baseballs, which he did with aplomb, there is no doubting his competitive spirit which leads me to think that although he claimed to Davina he wasn’t disappointed to leave, I’m sure in his heart of hearts he would have loved to of won. The needle between him and Ulrika probably the best moments in the house, although he did look good when they dressed him up, and his Latoya impression made me giggle early doors. His parting gift to the house was a Burger and Fries meal for seven after he hit a home run during his challenge.

Oh no, his parting gift was a swipe at America which took a gloss off the inauguration ceremony for the American house mates. After the Americans had requested that they were allowed to watch this life changing moment claiming that no matter if you were black or white it was a massive day for Americans, as Coolio, Latoya and Verne sat on the chair, left to right like a perfect colour scheme for this statement. As the video played Coolio was full of pride, and tears were imminent, a pat on the back from even Ulrika showing the seriousness of this moment, the celebrities fell silent for the best part of half an hour, Coolio sat fist raised a ‘la Jessie James. Then came Tommy bounding in with, ”At long last a president you can be proud of’.” Latoya and Verne incensed by his comments, maybe its for the best that Tommy has gone, cos the next time Verne gets drunk be sure it will come up!

Coolio showed his sensitive side after laughing in front of his fellow squatters, going to the bedroom to cry to himself and later stating to big brother that, ”He’s never felt this way, about a grown man in his life” Maybe fuelling the rumours Tommy was trying to get going with Davina that Coolio was a gay, but Coolio redeemed his manly-ness with a heroic statement, ”…I’d take a bullet for him”.

Tommy maybe shouldn’t be throwing out gay slurs considering his interview consisted of, ”I’ve played football my whole life, I like hanging around with other men.” and that, ”Ben’s a lovely looking guy.”

At this point I would like to lay salute to Latoya, who took on every task with vigour and I think she was great. I don’t think she would of minded staying there for another month and I expect her to have a ten minute slot on the Terry and Coolio show in which she is given a new task every week, there will also be a ten minute slot which involves Verne, a free bar, a donkey and some blow up dolls.

Chow!

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‘BenChelle’ Controversey In Celebrity Big Brother House


Terry Christian isn’t mincing his words in the Big Brother house,
after the previous nights confession about Ulrika’s ”high
handed” behaviour
he started day ten by addressing the situation
again, asking Ulrika if she was in a strop? After a brief
conversation in which Terry broke the original awkwardness with some
laughter things appeared to be diffused a little between him Ulrika,
but the motor mouth manc couldn’t leave it there and followed this up
with, ”I do think that you think you’re better than everyone else
though.” Boom, straight into the show, a show that Coolio didn’t
even dominate!

As the witches sat around the cauldron, and condemned Terry, is
Michelle being dragged into Tina and Ulrika’s clique? As the girls
offered words of support for Ulrika, Terry received some words of
support in the shape of Coolio, ”She dislikes you as much as she
dislikes me, she aint ever gonna forgive you”.

It appears paranoia is setting in too for some house mates, the
revelations that people had been talking about voting seems to have
left Latoya on edge. When discussing who she has bonded with she
struggled to mention anyone, and focussed more on not being able to
trust people, and that’s why she doesn’t have friends outside her
family. She speculated that there is a lot of eye talk going on in
the house and that Ulrika is playing a game, she claims she wants to
be voted out, but Latoya isn’t convinced, Latoya’s a Big Brother
veteran already, she’s rather clued up for a Jackson. Ulrika isolated
herself for most part of the day, whether that was to become more
boring so she is voted out or is she just  licking her wounds?
Well you know what they say, a wounded animal is the most dangerous.

Is it just me or is foul mouthed Tina ‘f**k**g’ Malone not all she
cracked up to be? I was expecting this dog to have a bite but there
is barely a bark. Granted she’s loud as hell but not once has she
confronted Coolio and she wasn’t as forthcoming to Terry as she’s
making Ulrika believe, she only seems brave when she’s sat on her bed
bitching with Ulrika. Eating her toe nails prompted my flat mate to
declare her the ”most vile human being on earth” harsh but at the
time it did seem fair.

As Tina made up English history for Latoya in the bathroom, the
‘World War Two’ knowledge was worrying, (nearly as bad as Ulrika
saying that if the Queen dies Charles becomes heir to the throne) the
conversation soon turned to BenChelle. Latoya asked, ”Have
you noticed two people are in love in here?” the two ladies
condemned the young ”friends” Latoya claiming ”they don’t know”

and that ‘’she is madly in love with him and he knows but is
playing it cool”
. The two confirmed this would just be between
them two, and everyone watching.

Cut to Ben Adams and Michelle arm wrestling in the living room,
Michelle Heaton’s breasts slumped on the footrest as sly Tina
says, ”Ben will win, cos Michelle will succumb to him”
and
then, ”She’s giving it all and he doesn’t care” this
insinuation was clocked by Michelle and Tina was quick to pretend she
was joking, if only Michelle knew that her friend Tina was dong twice
the damage Coolio could ever do to her relationship outside the
house.

The English test was quite funny, Verne as a Beefeater and Coolio
wearing a kilt were sublime touches and the electric shocks not
enough for big brother but Lycra outfits to boot, all in all
beautiful and funny TV, especially the last shock when no-one
expected it, fun for all the family until Tina exclaimed, ”I’m gonna
piss all over the floor”. The electric shocks must of tired people
out because it was an early night in the Celebrity Big Brother house,
not before Coolio managed to upset BenChelle again, prompting Ben to
finally grow some balls and voice off, in the privacy of the diary
room! Moaning how he hates loud people and claiming he is not
attracted to Michelle, ”It’s more friendship.”

The two faced swede who’d previously gossiped about Ben and Heaton
was on hand to offer support to the couple, saying its fine them
being friends, even though moments early she had been stoking Tina’s
fire by saying Ben was the spit of husband Andy Scott Lee!

Quote of the day was a close run thing between Coolio’s rubbish
poem, rap to big brother, and Tina’s emission to Terry, but Tina wins
hands down, after Terry’s suggestion that the younger ones would be
more interesting if it wasn’t for the oldies who are taking over the
house like him, Ulrika, Tommy, Coolio and Tina, suggesting they don’t
get a look in with these personalities, to which Tina replied,
”Because you and Coolio don’t shut up.” Pot, Kettle, T**t.

Is there love blossoming in the house?

With speculation mounting what do you think about Ben and
Michelle, personally i’m keeping my eyes on Terry and Coolio after
Terry’s admission that he loves the C man.

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Celebrity Big Brother Day 3 Headlines

Big Brother Headlines

Tina Cha’mone

Top (heavy) british talent Tina Malone compares herself to multi million selling, most succesful solo recording artist of all time Michael Jackson. ‘Genius boardering on madness like me, int he?’ she said to MJ’s older sister, Say what? Genius Tina! That is madness!

Verne Turns BIG 40

no one, not one person clocking the irorny of Verne mentioning that he is now the BIG 40!! Cummon people, work with me here!

Chef Coolio’s Chocolate Salty Balls

Coolio would rather wash his balls in the sink than miss the football match. The die hard football fan threatend other contestants when voting for the football, ‘you better raise your fucking hand man’ but then quickly realising what the token should be used for exclaiming, ‘What about beer?’. He’s really picked up English culture very quickly!!

Lucy Pinder latex Gloves!?

Not much happend but Lucy Pinder and latex gloves deserves headline news surely? perfect promotion no doubt for the Lucy Pinder Calender 2009!? Shamelesss! Love it!

Ulrika’s so down.

I didn’t know Ulrika was so with it, she really is cool! Embarsingly saying, ‘wicked’ and ‘boy’ when talking to Black Rapper Coolio. She’s really is a Dawg. Westside!

Johnsson Overcomes huge adversity to appear in Big Brother.

Turns out Johnsson struggled through months of back pain, pain that she related to thee plight of Verne, near worlds smallest man, in order to pick up the 120,000 cheque. It must of been reassuring to Troyer to know that there is someone in the house who he can relate to and sympathise with.

And Finally

Dirty Lucy Pinder

Pinder states, ‘She can talk about crap for ages’.
What? Thats news Worthy!? Ok enough with The Pinder!

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